Divorce Advice For Men

Divorce is a wrenching experience for all people involved, but society tends to focus it’s attention on women and children when it comes to divorce.  However, that is changing.

Recently there is more publicity regarding men and divorce.  More and more divorce attorneys are specializing in men’s issues and concerns–everything from financial to custody agreements.

Since each divorce case is different, the first thing a man should do is hire a divorce attorney.

Find a good family lawyer and set up an appointment. Some lawyers offer a complimentary consultation, others charge the minute you step in the office. At this initial meeting, your divorce attorney should offer you advice and a strategy for your particular facts and circumstances. You should also be able to figure out if this lawyer is a good fit for you.

Your attorney will also advise you about things you will need to consider such as financial accounts, insurance, living arrangements, child support, custody agreements, wills and retirement benefits.  In other words, all matters that will have an impact on your life after the divorce.

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Ten Reasons Why You Need A Divorce Lawyer

OK, the writing is on the wall…the marriage is irretrievably broken. You’ve decided to divorce. Thinking about going it alone and filing one of those DIY divorces. In a word, “Don’t!”

Here are the top 10 reasons you need a divorce lawyer:

1. A divorce lawyer can help you get a fair financial settlement.

2. A divorce lawyer can help you see issues clearly when your emotions start clouding your judgment.

3. A divorce lawyer can act as a buffer between you and your spouse when emotions run high and anger sets in.

4. A divorce attorney can make sure everything (money, insurance, pensions, 401ks etc.) is considered in the divorce agreement.

5. A divorce attorney can help to iron out complex custody arrangements.

6. A divorce lawyer knows the laws in your state and can assure the divorce papers are filed correctly so a judge can sign off on your divorce without delays.

7. A divorce lawyer can explain your rights and obligations clearly in plain language so you don’t have to struggle with confusing legal terms.

8. A divorce attorney can protect your interests and help you understand and negotiate offers made by your spouse’s attorney.

9. A divorce attorney can help you in court when there are problems with custody, child support and spousal support.

10. A good divorce lawyer knows his legal colleagues by reputation, what to expect from them and can anticipate problems before they occur.

Even though you and your spouse may agree that you don’t need a lawyer, you don’t want any nasty surprises either. It doesn’t hurt to at least have an initial consultation with a divorce attorney to get some insight into what you are facing.
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When You Don’t Want A Divorce But Have to Consider It

No one goes into their marriage wanting to fail. Many couples dont want divorce because they believe that it equals failure. New facts and figures now state that if divorce is not considered when problems arise in a marriage that couples can resolve their issues and have a stronger marriage.

If you are having problems and are considering divorce, make sure to try to find alternatives that promote fixing the problems via open and truthful communication or marriage counseling. This is preferable over the pain and effort involved in divorcing your spouse.

When others hear that you are having marriage trouble, many couples get unsolicited advice from friends and coworkers that they really dont want. Divorce to others can be seen as a quick fix when in truth it can simply add to your problems rather than fixing them. While you appreciate the support and advice offered by your friends, keep in mind that this is your marriage, not theirs.

By looking at statistics, 80 percent of surveyed couples who at one time considered divorce and subsequently decided not to go through with it claimed to be happily married years later. This can be explained by two possible outcomes. The first is that the couples who previously were considering divorce decided to deal with their problems directly. In doing so, it not only acknowledged their problems but it may have resulted in their finding effective solutions that saved their marriage.

The second is that when divorce was considered that it can change the entire dynamic of a relationship. For some couples this could be a positive thing or it could be detrimental to others. If a problem develops, those considering a divorce could see this as a way out without ever dealing with the issue directly. If these problems grow or the issues faced become more divisive, the option of divorce can be seen as an easy out and therefore become very appealing.

However, those who did not consider a divorce may find some success. They are forced to deal with their problems, and possibly find a constructive solution and common ground. Although this can be hard work and is not as easy as a divorce appears to be in fixing problems, working together and facing issues can be much more rewarding.

Marriage is a team of two players. When both players are actively working towards solutions to their problems and remove divorce as an option, resolutions can be found for their differences. This will strengthen their marriage as you will be working towards something better rather than looking for a way to cut your losses and run.

What if your spouse is determined to get a divorce even though you want to work to stay married?  This is often the case when the spouse is in the throes of passion for someone else and wants to be free to pursue the relationship.  You have two choices: either agree to the divorce or wait it out for several months to see if the relationship fizzles.  It’s possible that your spouse will back off from the relationship, creating an opening for the two of you to work out your differences and avoid divorce.  However, this is a gamble you have to be willing to take since it’s also possible your spouse will still want a divorce even after the other relationship is over.

If your spouse is determined to get a divorce the best thing to do is consult with a lawyer right away.  Divorce attorneys have seen and heard it all so they can advise you on exactly what your options are according to state laws.  Perhaps a legal separation is an alternative.  At the very least, it will create legal and financial guidelines within the marriage until a final decision can be made.
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5 Signs That Your Ex Boyfriend Still Likes You

It can be difficult for many to get over their ex boyfriend.

There are plenty of people who receive mixed signals from their ex boyfriends. While the ex was the one to end the relationship, he may still show signs of wanting to get back together. It is important for exes to understand whether or not their ex boyfriend wants them back. These five signs will help you to know that your ex boyfriend still likes you and wants to get back with you.

He’s Still Calling You

Your ex boyfriend is not going to try to talk to you if he is completely over you. If your boyfriend is still calling you, he still likes you. He may want to hear your voice, or he may want to see if you still have a connection with him. Either way, you can be sure that he likes you.

He’s Still Texting You

Texting after a break up is similar to calling after a break up. He wants to check in on you, see what you are up to, and how you are doing. If your ex boyfriend is still texting you incessantly, he still likes you.

He Wants to Catch Up

There are plenty of relationships that end with both parties staying friends. Both people usually need a few months apart, however, to get over the break up. If your ex boyfriend wants to catch up with you less than one month after your break up, you can be sure that he still likes you.

He Wants to Take You On a Date

One of the most obvious signs that your ex boyfriend still likes you comes in the form of a simple question. If your ex boyfriend asks you out on a date, he still likes you. A date shows that he is serious about trying to get back together with you, and that he is going to try to make a move.

He Talks to Your Friends

Ex boyfriends that still like their girlfriends are going to talk to their friends. They want to know how you are doing, and want to gauge their chances at a reconciliation. If your ex boyfriend talks to your friends about you, he still likes you.

Certain actions, such as wanting to take you on a date, are going to make it obvious that your ex boyfriend still likes you. Other actions, such as calls or texts, can be misleading. Take the time to think about the entire situation; do not overreact to the different signs that you find. Simply take them into consideration as you debate your emotions and your options.

7 Top Signs Of Cheating In A Relationship

When someone’s cheating, their behavior usually changes.  They may do things out of the ordinary.  They may suddenly change their routine.

But  just because you see signs of cheating in a relationship, it doesn’t necessarily mean cheating is going on.  Once you’ve seen the signs, you’ll have to look further to determine if cheating is really happening.

And sometimes there are no signs of cheating in a relationship and yet cheating is going on. It’s not an easy position to be in, to have to figure these things out.

Here are a few signs something is going awry. Don’t make a decision just based on one or even a few of them. But a lot of evidence can certainly let you know that something may be wrong, and you may want to look at little closer.

• Secret cell phone conversations are one of the top signs. If your partner leaves the room every time the cell phone rings, you have to wonder why. Were they taught that’s polite? If they’re at all strange acting about the conversation, you should pay attention.

• Sudden change in hygiene is common when someone is having an affair. If your partner never goes to any special trouble for you to make sure he or she looks and smells good, a change in this could be worrisome. If they’re making themselves nice for you, that’s great. If they’re dolling up to go out, you have to wonder why.

• More arguments can be one of the signs of cheating in a relationship. Particularly if it seems your partner is starting the argument for no reason and then storming out because of it. It could be just an excuse to leave and have some time away from you without having to come up with another excuse.

• Catching your partner in a lie can mean trouble. Even the smallest lie shows that person’s willingness to lie in general. Look for connections between that lie and the possibility of an affair.

• An increase in computer time can be a bad sign. If your partner is spending hours online after you’re in bed or while you’re doing other things, it could be an affair.

• A common sign of cheating is if your friends act strange. They might know something you don’t and feel uncomfortable around you.

• And a painfully common sign of cheating is if your partner accuses you of cheating or hints that he thinks you might be having an affair. Often that’s a guilty conscious talking and you’re being accused of the very thing causing him or her guilt.

Unfortunately the only way to know for sure is to have real evidence. So remember that even though these are common signs of cheating in a relationship, none of them is absolute proof an affair is occurring, but they are signals that your partner is unhappy with some aspect of the relationship.